Entry: Wed., Nov. 3, 2010 Tuesday, November 02, 2010



Vote for the accomplished malcontent

Happy election day to one and all here in these united states. What a great moment, huh? All of those comedians who now double as political authorities are no doubt chattiní it up big time today. God bless Ďem. So listen, I have a confession to make. I did not vote today. I am not sporting  a little sticky paper button with an American flag in the background that says ďI votedĒ on my shirt.  Why is this? Because, in truth, I have pretty much made my mind up not to vote again. Ever, if I can help it. I am tired of the whole thing Ė the well-coiffed guys on tv endlessly talking and the radio programs and the flip talk show hosts, the advertisements, the weekly rallies for something in Washington and the phonies who legislate. Show biz. There is this song by a band called The Avett Brothers, a band I have been digging much lately. The song is called Head Full of Doubt/Road Full of Promise. It contains a line that when I first heard it, finally tipped me to the side of conscientious voting objector Ė hell no, I wonít vote. I have been thinking about this stance for awhile. The line goes like this: ďWhen nothing is owed or deserved or expected/ and your life doesnít change by the man thatís elected.Ē Yes, thank you, boys. I am so glad I am not the only one who thinks this. Seriously, I think the whole political thing just rolls on one way or another. Doesnít matter, who we elect, the results are essentially the same. Meet the new boss, same as the old boss. Plus I do not care any more about a Barrack Obama or a Sarah Palin than they or any of these other wealthy tools care about me. So Iím done with it, and I feel good. Whatís really cool about this decision is that it frees me now from ever having to watch any political talk shows or having to get into any political discussions or read any of this nonsense that has so little to do with my little life. CNN Ė buh bye. Now I can watch Boardwalk Empire on HBO and not have to worry about where I stand on gay marriage or health insurance. Ahhhh. Actually Boardwalk Empire, which btw I loooove, had a lesbian love scene in it last Sunday. Much more interesting than anything Anderson Cooper would ever do for my entertainment pleasure.

Oh and speaking of voting, or not, I told you yesterday about the stunning nomination of Nation of One for a coveted Mobbie award, which is a contest being run by the Baltimore Sun for the best blog or social network site in all the land, as long as the person writing it happens to be based here in Miserable Maryland. Well today the actual Mobbie voting opened. (Btw I thought the award was called a Moobie; thatís what I called it yesterday Ė moo like cow. But itís Mob like Don Vito Corleone. Oopsie. I wonít win now for sure. Canít even spell the damn thing. ) Anyway, yes, I did say voting a few lines back there. This contest isnít like someone reads a blog and judges it and smiles broadly or smirks and flatulates and then grades your work. No, you have to actually go on the Baltimore Sun website and you have to register and you have to tell them your sex and birthday and whether you have any visible birthmarks (I just made that part up) and then you have to invent a cute name and a password and then you submit this mound of work and as a reward you get an email to confirm all this and then you actually have to go back to the site and then you actually get to vote. Oy. This is harder to do than voting for an actual Presidential or gubernatorial candidate, which you could have actually done today in less time than voting for a Mobbie. I know all this info because, naturally I went on the site today and checked it out so I could provide you some intelligence on the process. I was hoping it would be nice and easy and I could send you a swell link and we would be done with it. But no. You need everything but a passport. Pain in the butt and perhaps not worth the hassle. The winner, I think, gets their blog posted on the Baltimore Sun. Thatís why La Sooze nominated this space in the first place, because she thinks we should have a broader readership here, that the Nation should expand its borders, if you will. To be honest Iím not convinced thatís a great idea. Iíd rather keep things intimate. Just you and me and a couple of our friends mocking all the popular kids.  Honestly, Iíd prefer a few hundred bucks or a moderately used car with all-wheel drive, neither of which will happen. Anyway if youíre absolutely dead set on voting for the Nation for this go to the Sunís website (www.baltimoresun.com) and look for THE MOBBIES link near up near the banner on the right side an click away for yourself and donít forget to come up with a funtastic username. Itís up to you, of course. I donít personally care since I, myself, do not vote for anything. Except Nation of One for a best humor blog for a Mobbie, of course. I did do that, but itís such an apolitical blog I figured it was okay. Just this once.

 Oh and speaking of the Mobbies and all that, yesterday I mentioned that the Nation was one of only one or two nominated blogs that didnít have an adorable little descriptive phrase as part of it name, a little qualifier. So I asked for submissions yesterday and actually got two today Ė both of which were quite good. My music friend Bill, a terrific guitarist and songwriter and teacher suggested this possible sub-head: Miserable Marylandís Morning Muse. Not bad, huh? Alliterative to boot. Another friend, Peter, who I worked with many moons ago, suggested in an e-mail: Nation of One - Reflections of an Aspiring Curmudgeon. This is probably as accurate as it gets, though I do not think of myself so much as aspiring, more like an accomplished malcontent.  I have worked long and hard at this attitude.

So listen, I keep forgetting to tell you but this weekend I have a family affair in Cali. In fact La Sooze and I and Daughter Shannon are flying on a jet plane to Cali on Thursday and will be there for the weekend. Number One son Sean is flying there too from Bahston and will meet up with us in the idyllic cool of the west. The occasion is the marriage of my cousinís daughter, who, according to the trusty internet, is my cousin once removed but it is ok to call her my niece. Good to know. Anyway my niece on Saturday is marrying a terrific hunky guy, which makes sense since she herself is quite beautiful. My cousin is quite beautiful too, as is her sister, my other cousin. Good genes over there. What happened on my side of the fam I cannot say. Anyway I am looking forward to these few precious days with family in the Cali sun far, far away from Miserable Maryland where already today on Nov. 2 the first day of Mobbie voting, it was 28 degrees this morning and there was frost on the windshield of number two son Kevinís car parked silently on the street in front of God View. Kevin btw, is not coming to the wedding because he is a newly-minted  freshman at Syracuse University and has much work to do in writing papers that he will then pass on to me for comments. Kevin sent me a note over the weekend when it was cool here but sunny in the Miz. The note said simply: ďItís snowing like hell here.Ē I bet it was. It is Syracuse, after all. He may regret not going to Cali with us, like I may regret someday my decision to never vote for another candidate as long as I may live. I guess in the end we will both get out of these things exactly what we have put into them.

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